So, even though life has taken another turn towards the miserable and bizarre, I experienced an exciting event this morning with my cat Sarge.
He took a moment out of his day to brush my teeth.
Ever since I took him in as a stray and got his first vet visits out of the way, he has basically followed me wherever I go in the house. He likes to climb and sit on my shoulders normally, but that’s not entirely possible when I first wake up in the morning and I take the shirtless walk to the bathroom where I brush my teeth.
So, today (when he tried climbing towards my shoulders), I grabbed him and held him for a moment as I planned to finish brushing my teeth. He had been following the progress intently up to that point and kept trying to grab the toothbrush as if he would help me use it.
I know you are going to say, “but all cats grab things like that,” and I would have agreed before this happened. He carefully grasped my toothbrush between his black padded paws and navigated my gums, incisors, and molars to scrub them until they were sparkling.
Just when I thought he was done, he started flossing for me and I knew it wasn’t a fluke - I own the smartest kitty in the world.
Christ, I get it already.
You don’t like what I do or who I am. I have read your anonymous messages - I just choose not to post them.
Posting volumes of anonymous hate mail is just as bad as posting self aggrandizing bullshit and volumes of praise. I don’t often receive either, but I try not to take part in it.
The internet is a cult of mutual admiration circle jerks and watching the people you care about build an Internet persona (which is so achingly sincere it is nauseating or so calculated it verges on self parody). It’s all growing tiresome.
Of course, this is coming from someone who uses an alias and also has their own logo stitched to the back of their jacket.
Gah.
FTW.







